Lacking Commitment

Are you familiar with the phrase "hooking up?"  It is a term used in what we'll call the Laguna Beach generation.  Or the generation that grew up on the MTV without any real music videos.  I would consider myself a part of that generation.  It is still widely used today to describe anything from exchanging phone numbers to spending the night with someone.  In other words, it has no concrete meaning - it means whatever the user wants it to mean each time it is used.

I still hear people use it today as a college student.  I wouldn't be surprised if people much older than me use it as well.  I have heard it used so many times, that I have conditioned myself to assume the most extreme definition of the phrase.  As someone who has never used the phrase, or had a reason to use the phrase, I also have to remind myself to respond to it out of a place of love.  Not in a  way that is judgmental and condemning.

What I really feel when I hear someone use the term "hooking up," is sadness.  It is a dull pang of hurt for them, that they are settling for ambiguity instead of commitment.  Uncertainty instead of faithfulness.

Faithfulness is important in all types of relationships - not just romantic relationships.  But it seems it so often gets abused most notoriously in that type of relationship.  Faithfulness is a Godly way of affirming worth.  Our true value and identity are in Christ alone.  However, as individuals, we do acknowledge or reflect that value in our relationships.  Maintaining faithfulness is a way of acknowledging that we know each other's worth - not according to our standards - but by God's standards.

Because God is faithful, so too are we called to be faithful.  Have you ever had an experience where you feel that someone is asking something of you that they aren't willing to do themselves?  Isn't it frustrating?  But in our relationship with God, that is not the case.  That is why we can assuredly say that He is a just God.  God was faithful to us first, and continues to be faithful.  He asks us to be faithful in our relationship to Him, and the relationships we have with others that seek to glorify Him.

There is a praise song that sums it up quite nicely:

Faithfulness, faithfulness is what I long for

Faithfulness is what I need

Faithfulness, faithfulness is what You want from me

When you experience even just a glimpse, a mere moment of God's faithfulness, you will begin to long for it.  You will find it fills you like nothing you have experienced before.  You will find you need Him.  You will find that faithfulness is what He calls you to.

~SP  

      

THURSDAY APRIL 17TH: The Arby's Story (Or, How God Ordains the Little Moments)

"For I know the plans that I have for you" declares the Lord.  We often cling to this prophecy in Jeremiah 29 when we don't know what the immediate or distant future holds for us.  In this verse we often focus on our own plans.  We focus on the job plans, the school plans, the marriage plans, the kid plans, the home plans...what about the way we fit in to God's plan.  He ordains those plans too.  It is not just about God knowing where we will go to grad school or when we are going to get an accepted offer on a house.  It is about God knowing where He can use us to show His grace and spread His love.

A few years ago, back when I was in high school, my family and I stopped at Arby's after church.  We often grabbed lunch at Arby's or Culver's near our church when we had something to do right after church.  On this particular Sunday we were headed downtown Milwaukee to the Domes.  The Domes, for non-Milwaukee natives, are three large domes that contain botanical gardens.  I believe on this Sunday I was playing for a St. Patricks Day event.  So we stopped at Arby's to fuel up before heading downtown.

There was a young man who worked at this Arby's - we will never know his real name - so we'll just refer to him as Arby's guy.  Arby's guy was a notorious mumbler.  After "Welcome to Arbys..." you couldn't understand anything he said.  So orders would often get jumbled up.  You could always expect to get something different that what you intended to order.  It happened to us that day, and we ended up with an extra free sandwich, courtesy of Arby's.  None of us needed this sandwich so we just held on to it for later, and we headed downtown.

Milwaukee is a wonderful place.  It has rich culture.  It is also a place where God is at work.  There is a lot of brokenness and poverty, just like many places across the country.  God is at work through many people, churches and missions, helping to feed the hungry and to give the homeless a place to belong.  As we drove downtown that day there was a man standing on the side of a bridge with a sign.  I can't tell you exactly what it said, but I know it was something about food.

This bridge was not an easy place to pull over on our journey downtown.  We were a few lanes over from the man, and we were not able to stop.  But I can remember my brother saying, I want to give that man our sandwich.  My dad had to keep driving, but he promised we would swing back that way after we were done at the Domes to see if the man was still there.

About two hours later it was time to leave, and my dad made good on his promise.  We drove around the same way, this time in the lane closest to the side of the bridge that the man would be on.  And he was still there.  We were able to pull over, roll down the window and give him the extra Arby's sandwich.

God has a perfect will and a perfect plan laid out for our lives, and the lives of others, each day.  He knows that a messed up fast food order for a family who attends church in Brookfield, will provide a long-awaited lunch for a man living on the streets of Milwaukee.

No coincidence.  The Author and Perfector knows the words before He pens them.  He knows our stories.  Each and every detail.

I know that I am a planner.  You don't have to give me a personality test to help me figure that one out.  And when things don't go according to plan...watch out!  But I step back, and I realize that I was created by the ultimate planner.  One who has laid it all out from the beginning.  The Planner who can take the willings and the doings of broken people and weave them back in to His will and His purpose.

~SP

MONDAY APRIL 7TH: The Essay I Should Have Written

During the past year I have been up to my eye balls in personal statements and essays.  The career services office at IU would tell you the purpose of writing these statements is to market yourself in the best way possible.  What writing these statements will do is bring on a heavy dose of self-reflection.  And panic - because there are moments when you just can't figure out how to put yourself on a piece of paper.

I am honored to report that one of those personal essays has secured me a spot as a dietetic intern at Mt. Mary University next year.  God is good.  He is patient.  His will is glorious.  I am so excited to continue on this journey to serve Him as a dietitian.  (This is just an announcement on the side :) )

I had to write a personal essay this year on what my greatest accomplishment at IU was.  I feel like I've done a lot at IU these past fours - nevertheless, it took me forever to write.  I loaded it full of academic this and teaching assistant that.  Volunteer hours here, leadership role there.  Those things are all great - but they don't do justice to what these four years have been in my life.

My mom explained it perfectly this evening while we were chatting: these four years have been remarkable because of the way I have grown in my relationship with Jesus Christ.  I have truly become a new person in Him.

Rough days, weeks and months have gone by, but I have experienced the savior who calms the storms within me.  I have experienced the redeeming power of the God who truly sees me.  I have buried myself in the miry pit, and have been pulled out by God's gracious hand.

I have watched my parents work everyday to live a life that is glorifying to God, and I have started to learn what that means for my own life.  What it means to wake up every morning and show faith, trust, grace, love - just like Jesus would have.

So if I could re-write that essay, I would say it is not about what I have accomplished, but about who I have become.  When I leave IU, I will add "Hoosier" to my identity.  I gave four years of time to this place.  But I am first and foremost the daughter of a good and glorious King.  I have given my life to Him.  My truest identity is in Him.

~SP

TUESDAY APRIL 1ST: Selfies

Have you every witnessed someone taking a "selfie?"

(First, let us formally define selfie.  A selfie is where a person uses a camera-type device - typically a smart phone - and holds it out in front of them self in order to capture a picture.  No one has yet found a floating camera.  And most of us do not have personal photographers who follow us constantly.  So we take selfies.)

It is such a strange moment to catch another person taking a picture of them self.  They know you're watching, and so they make haste so as not to make it a huge ordeal.  Because of technological developments, they are not able to see the image that the camera will capture as they take it.  This allows them to alter their hair or make different faces before snapping the picture.

Selfie-taking is so prevalent in our culture today that people are already doing studies on it.  Why are we so obsessed with taking pictures of ourselves.

This is what I want to do a study on - how many selfies have you taken that you are truly satisfied with?  How many have you taken without being critical of your looks?  How many times have you not retaken a selfie - just went with the first one you took?

Selfies are rough.  Our arms aren't long enough to get the phone a proper distance away.  Selfies get us where we are vulnerable - right up in our grill.  So we mask that vulnerability with a pouty lip or scrunched eyes.

In my opinion, a selfie also says it's all about me!  That is an attitude that may get you far in life - but you won't end up in the places that you want to be.

But here's is another problem with selfies - it is a failed attempt at introspection.  It is a good thing to know one's self.  To know your identity - specifically your identity in Christ.  But when we look at ourselves in the selfie type way, we are cheating ourselves.  We can't be honest in that moment when it is just us.  We have to prove something to ourselves - that we can live up to the world's standards; that we can compare to others.

So here is some photography advice:

Give Someone Else the Camera

You are beautiful.  That is not a cliche.  That is a fact.  The one who made you thinks so every day.  He spent time and put care into making you who you are.  He knows you in the purest and most whole way.  He can see what the world can't see.  He can see what you  can't see.  But He longs for you to see it too.  He longs for you to know that you are beautiful because He created you.  It may be difficult to understand, but if you set aside the world's standards for beauty and for living, it can be revealed to you.  You can start to embrace it.

Turn the Camera Around

The beauty of the very first camera my parents gave me was the element of surprise.  It was probably between 1996 and 2000, (that was the year, not age of the camera) and you still had to press a button to pop up the flash.  It was a film camera - not a digital camera - no screen to show you what you are looking at.  So when I didn't know what the images looked like until they were developed.  But they were beautiful.  They were what I never expected.  They were a beautiful moment captured.  I saw what was outside of myself, and it was beautiful.  If I had only spent time taking pictures of me, I would have missed everything around me.

~SP